Summer Lovin’

It’s not technically the last day of summer, but it has been a long time since you last heard mention of my dating adventures. And as this entry posts to my blog, I’m somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean heading back from two and a half weeks in Europe, which means I’ll have lots to post about my travels in the coming weeks instead of about the men of Boulder. And, one more reason for the timing of this post, today is the six month anniversary of my first date since the big breakup earlier this year, and I have a thing for posting on artificially significant dates. So here goes!

The 3D and Graphic Designer: He’s really sweet and we had a great time together for almost two months, though we rarely saw each other more than once a week. But I knew pretty early on that I wasn’t going to want a relationship with him. Partly, because he’s not a reader. Books are so important in my life and after a five year relationship with another person who didn’t read much and then dating someone who read aloud to me (an unbelievably sexy experience), well, yeah, I just couldn’t. There are a few other reasons I didn’t want anything serious or long term with him, but I really like him as a person and I dated him long enough that I think it would be inappropriate to blab about him here.

The Healthcare IT Manager: He was positive, upbeat, engaging, fit, decently attractive. But he was too Boulder for me. Too soft. Not skeptical or critical enough. Too much of a pie-in-the-sky attitude. I need a little edge in a guy.

The Specialty Videography Company Owner: If people are supposed to be at their best on a first date and this guy was giving it his best, I’m not interested in what anything less is like for him. He complained the entire time. About parking in Boulder, the number of people in Boulder, his existing customers, his potential customers, marketing and sales, his employees. Just on and on and on. I’m really good about making a date engaging and fun even when I’m not interested in the other person romantically at all. I like talking to people and figuring out what we have in common. But this guy drained me. I had nothing to say. I tried to steer the conversation in different directions a few times but he just wanted to complain about his work. And do a little name dropping. And bragging. I couldn’t connect with him on any level. He was depressing.

The Environmental Lawyer: If the Healthcare IT Manger was too Boulder for me, I don’t know how to describe this guy. I don’t have to, and don’t want to, agree with my romantic partner on all the big philosophical and political questions of life, but he expressed too many opinions that I simply couldn’t respect. He was plenty intelligent, just too, too, too Boulder. Also, he looked much older in person than he did in his photos. There was no attraction on my end.

The Rocket Scientist (seriously)Another guy who was too normal for me. Another guy who was everything I should want but nothing I do. Successful, well-traveled, intelligent, cute, caring, engaging…all the things. But it only took two and a half dates for me to realize that he wasn’t for me. He craved normalcy and seemed to just want to be in an established relationship, as if anyone would do. He was happily settling down in his four-bedroom house in the suburbs (one with “room to grow into”) and was considering getting a Labrador retriever. Those things are the very antithesis of me, the substance of my own personal horror film.

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As I said, I’m on a return flight from a European vacation. European! Cultured, gorgeous, fit European men available for a fling, even with a not-so-young-anymore American. I haven’t updated this post since before I left. Is there a swarthy young Italian with a heart-throb accent I should have included on this list? A brawny, blonde Austrian? A clean-cut, trilingual Swiss citizen with a chiseled jawline? Maybe. Or maybe there’s someone at home who’s been too much on my mind for me to notice other men. Or, even better, maybe I’ve eaten too much pasta, fondue, bread, chocolate, pastries, schnitzel, cheese, wurst, polenta, and gelato to fit in my pants anymore to get out the door for a date!



  1. […] So what’s next? In writing, I have a handful of short stories I’ve been toying with for months. I’m excited about them and intend to put some real work into them. I have another handful that require some solid revision work but are near completion, so I plan to finish those up and start submitting them to literary journals. In dating, well, I’m nothing if not resilient, independent, and self-loving. I enjoy dating. I like meeting people and hearing their stories. And the timing couldn’t have been better; I love dressing up and going out in the summer. There’s so much to do and I feel fantastic about life when the sun is shining. So, get ready for the return of the dating recaps! […]



  2. […] As promised, my dating recaps are back. There are a few new (or new to me) dating apps out there since last summer that I’ve tried (Hinge and The League, for example), but I still find that Bumble has the most potential and attractive dates and has a format I prefer. So, I’ve been on there matching, unmatching, connecting, ignoring, and sometimes managing to fit in a date or two into my busy schedule. And when I do go out, of course I come home and take copious notes on everything the person did and said, and everything that transpired between us. People are always fascinating and get my creative juices flowing, even when they do nothing else for me. I primarily use my notes for fiction characters and keep these people anonymous, but I enjoy putting a little record out there for the public too. So here we are, first with two of my dates from last summer never who got their recap because their status was in progress at the time of my dating last post. […]



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